Dude, stop using the other N-word

Kirjoittaja on New Yorkissa varttunut ja Helsingissä naisistunut copywriter.

Dear Mom,

So, it’s Women’s Day. To celebrate, I got a rose, yummy pancakes and… accused of nagging. And while words like “nagging”, “jäkättää” and “nalkuttaa” are always infuriating, I figured today was as good a day (ok, maybe the best day) as any to bitch (oh yeah, I forgot to add “bitching”) about it. The fact is this: Men complain. Sometimes they even have to explain or point something out several times. But if you have a dick this is called ”repeating yourself”. If you don’t, you’re ”nagging”.

Finland constantly tops the list of the most gender-equal places on Earth. Men take paternity leave, there are lots of female MPs, and you’re probably going to be disappointed if you expect a male date to pay for your dinner. Yet I know tons of “naggers” like me. You know, women who’ve always got something to bitch about (i.e. an opinion), have PMS 24/7 (i.e. sometimes actually get annoyed), and repeat things like 500 times (because if they didn’t, they’d never get done!!!).

Playing the nagging card is an offensive and annoyingly effective way to end a conversation. I’m pretty good at comebacks, but the best one I’ve come up with so far is… well, nothing. And that’s because there kinda’ isn’t one.

The only function of the nagger label is to remove the authority, force, and even humor from what women have to say. It trivializes our words and our brains. And you know what? That’s really f***ed up.

So if you’ve got a dick, stop using the other “N-word”. And if you don’t and you’ve found yourself wondering if maybe he’s right and you are a nagger, trust me, you’re good.

Love, Lissu